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 �what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux "i desire to live in peace and to continue the life i have begun under the motto, to live well you must live unseen." - rene descartes note random entry image credit design by : ilazarn ikmal powered by : diaryland |
on business.
2020-01-21 @ 4:41 p.m.
things are happening really fast and it's a little bit scary. i realized, during all of this, that best friend and i make a great team because we both have completely different strengths, as well as physical capabilities. i am the one good at managing, minutae, boring paperwork and following rules. she is the one good at having ideas and the energy and drive to implement them immediately. i think she also really wants to be the face of this, which i am okay with because i am okay with being completely behind the scenes. i know this is "our" thing but it's really her thing and i am a great worker bee. i like it when a person says, "here is a list of stuff to do." that is where i thrive. i was thinking about this today while i was getting ready for work - i am attracted to high energy, highly driven people who can just bark orders at me. i work best when i don't have to think about anything too hard, just do. i worry about the part of this where we need to be "on" and dealing with customers, but i think that she has known me long enough to know that i'm not crazy about it and will happily bow out when and if possible. give me the bills, give me the paperwork. i got you. trying to sell someone on something? smiling and waving at strangers? fucking kill me instead, thanks. i'm feeling a little frustrated that she got so gung ho on this so suddenly, because my plan for my life included me getting my business back on its feet this year, but i guess this will provide me the extra money (and managerial/bookkeeping experience) i need to do that. i had already talked to boss about it and had a timeline and everything ready to go, but now it looks like a lot of my weekends (and quite a few evenings during the week) are going to be absorbed by this. i will be very frustrated if it's a waste, or people don't think we're as good as we do. but all i can do is say we'll see. i'm writing today because i had these little thoughts floating around all day, but also because this is my last free weekend before ER goes away and i'm doing his schedule and mine. i am dreading it, truly, but i am not dreading the money. that's literally the only thing that is going to keep me going. i hate working at the new place, it's fucking cold and boring over there, and i'm playing salesman. or saleswoman, whatever. either way, 12 days of this will be a special type of torture. need to find myself some good educational reading to pass the time and hopefully teach me a thing or two about managing. i want to be the complete package behind the scenes. she can look cute on insta, she can have full creative control, she can have all that. not for me. just some quick thoughts. we're getting ready to leave so i'd better wrap this up before i get started on my half-written entry thing again. until next time. |