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 �what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux "i desire to live in peace and to continue the life i have begun under the motto, to live well you must live unseen." - rene descartes note random entry image credit design by : ilazarn ikmal powered by : diaryland |
think on that.
2016-10-31 @ 10:29 p.m.
i had like all of this stuff over the course of the week that built up that i wanted to write about, and now i finally have the time and am ready to go but i have completely blanked. so i'll just mention that i'm dying of cramps right now, smoked a lot of pot (probably why i forgot everything i wanted to write about) so bear with me. everyone started calling me "the boss" at work, because everyone realizes that boss is a hot fucking mess and i am the glue that holds everyone's different departments together. and recently i have started to notice that i've really become his right hand. now things have gone toward me managing some personal matters as well. which is cool, i have no problem with that. but it makes it interesting to see the inner workings of people. to hear the employees' perception of this person, and then to be allowed to see behind the curtain. this job has helped me in a lot of ways as far as mental health is concerned, but lately the biggest thing that is really hitting home for me is that we are all just kind of winging it. boss is worth over a million dollars, owns multiple businesses, knows multiple languages, but doesn't know how to do his own laundry and is afraid to spend the night home alone. what? had a wonderful weekend with boy. he had to work all weekend, as always, but that was cool because i was able to sleep in really late and just be generally lazy. when i'm home, i feel like i need to be doing something because there really are a lot of things that need to be done. but you know, sometimes you just didn't sleep well during the week or you have your period or you're just mentally exhausted or whatever and you just want to eat food and move as little as possible and not feel GUILTY about it. so whenever i'm up there i really indulge in that. but anyway, he was so awesome. so lovey dovey. we cuddled so much. one night we were sitting and smoking on the bed, talking about something, and he brought up this random memory of when we were 17. and i'm like aww this guy actually really likes me. and i really like him too. he's really making an effort. he's being much more fair, much less selfish, much more considerate. he started being a dick last night because he forgot he had to scan some documents for work, but the scanner is in little A's room and he was asleep already. i was describing to him how to do it and he got all frustrated and snippy and was like "ugh i thought you'd just do it since i have to get up in 2 hours," then immediately apologized for being grumpy and tired and rude. ok cool, thanks! so instead of fighting about it, we figured out an easier, faster method of doing it and then got in bed and snuggled hard. fucking excellent, high five, so much love. so love has been really good, sex has been great, we had our 7 year (!!) anniversary not that long ago and we both agree that we still really love each other and want to be together forever and all that mushy shit, and yeah. i'm 100%. it only took me 11 months to decide. or maybe 7 years? hmm. |