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 �what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux "i desire to live in peace and to continue the life i have begun under the motto, to live well you must live unseen." - rene descartes note random entry image credit design by : ilazarn ikmal powered by : diaryland |
whatever happens.
2006-11-01 @ 2:18 p.m.
i say "oh, god," but really i am talking to no one. i know that no one is there to help me. i know that i am in charge of my own destiny. and i know that i need to be strong to make the right decisions. because whatever happens to me is my fault. whatever happens to me is my fault. whatever happens to me is my fault. today i was sitting on the filing cabinet in the back of the room and he came over and sat next to me. he was so close i could feel the heat of his body. his scent filled my nostrils. i was lucky ... no one was around. i swear my mind left my body and i was left with nothing but instincts. i could have been fired today. nothing happened. i had a dream about another one last night. i'm not interested, nor do i entertain it. he's way too young. way too young. but the other ... i hate myself for feeling this way. |