tinea:any of a number of infectious diseases

�what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux

"i desire to live in peace and to continue the life i have begun under the motto, to live well you must live unseen." - rene descartes

interact

note
email
random entry
image credit

credits

design by : ilazarn ikmal
powered by : diaryland

feeling bad on such a lovely day.

2010-10-25 @ 3:31 p.m.

i feel a little depressed. he and i have to spend too much time apart. he gets mopey and as a result doesn't say much, or gets easily agitated. i sit here and start to worry and think crazy thoughts. i know he gets frustrated that we can't have sex every second, and i do too. living 70ish miles apart is hard.

we went to dinner last night and it was nice. i think he was a little mad that i didn't come up [to his house] afterward. i know he really wanted me to, but i didn't feed the cats, my doors and windows were left open and unlocked, and i just couldn't go. if i had known earlier, i would have prepared appropriately. plus, it was another 30-40 minutes away from where we met, and then in 2 hours i'd have to head back down to my house.

this is tough. i know it's really wrong to wish misfortune on him, but i wish he would just move back in with me. his old landlord told him that there's a new, huge apartment available in the building again, and he's all excited about moving into it in a couple weeks, provided the landlord wasn't leading him on. i miss him soooo much, it's almost unbearable. i don't have a lot of interesting things to talk about when he calls me because i spend my whole day busying myself with making things so i forget how lonely i am.

i had a dream we were choosing diamonds together. like they were all loose in a big bin, and we were picking the one that was just the right blush color. i want to do that soon. we need to be close. my heart is starting to hurt.

by the weather, you'd never know it. it's sunny and 75 and breezy and perfect. but i keep closing all the windows and hiding inside.

eta: he called me back and said he was sorry for being a douche on the phone. he just misses me terribly. i said, believe me honey. i know. i know all about it.