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 �what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux "i desire to live in peace and to continue the life i have begun under the motto, to live well you must live unseen." - rene descartes note random entry image credit design by : ilazarn ikmal powered by : diaryland |
my happy life.
2011-06-13 @ 9:13 p.m.
it's not my birthday yet, but it will be soon, and my parents will be away, so we had my birthday dinner early at my grandmother's house. she doesn't like a lot of different foods, so we figured we would have a "family dinner" (we always have to have one of those for each holiday, where at the very least, the immediate family gets together) as my birthday dinner, and then the boy could take me out on my actual day. my mom was totally amped up about my gift this year, which was weird because she has never hyped up a gift, at least not as long as i can remember, and i remember everything. so she called boy one day last week to ask if they had gotten me the same thing, and after speaking to her he said, "no, we didn't, and there's no way i could afford something so extravagant." and i was like, "wow, really?" and he said that i was going to be so excited and pleased because it was something that i really wanted and needed. so we went up there yesterday and my mom made this huge spread of picnic-y foods. it was so good. just totally common things, but things that you don't get all that often. scalloped potatoes, homemade baked beans, low and slow ribs, and other stuff like that. so she told me to open my present before we went over to eat (we met at my mom's house first) because she knew it would "take a while." i'm opening up this huge box, that's only wrapped 3/4 of the way because she didn't expect it to use so much paper. i could see the exposed box and it was just solid black with no print, and i'm thinking, "what the fuck is this?" and then i get to the lid, and it's a new laptop! color me absolutely surprised, really, especially because my mom had been secretly asking me all kinds of computer specs questions for the past 6 months or so, pretending she was asking for a co-worker or something, and really she was building me the perfect gaming laptop. blu-ray r/w and everything. so awesome, and so totally completely unexpected. so that night was fantastic, and of course the boy and i just being so ridiculously in love lately. it's like once we stopped letting everything else that there is to worry about bring us down, he just comes home to me and it's sanctuary. we were cooking today and he just came over and kissed me forever, and hugged me so hard, and we just smiled at each other. there is nothing to worry about when we know we have each other. and we were laying in the basement, high as fuck, and i said, "i wish i had like 5 cats, but i have absolutely no desire whatsoever to take care of them. the ones i have are enough." and he looked at me so seriously and said, "i feel the exact way about kids." and i laughed and said, "me too," but he got really serious and said, "no, really. sometimes i'm just really not in the mood." and yet again, so happy to hear this, because i have absolutely no intention of reproducing. i keep mentioning that here and everywhere, because people seem to think i'm going to change my mind about it, but um ... no. and as soon as i turn 30 i'm getting my tubes tied, since no one will do it for you before then. and yeah, everyone's got some story of some person they know who had it done, but no one will do it to a woman under 30 who has no kids just because she doesn't want kids. and if anyone out there is still thinking they know it all, please send me the name and number of the fucking doctor in NJ who will do it right now and you can say "told ya so," because i'm really fucking tired of people telling me how easy it is when it is, in fact, not. so anyway, other than the fact that i cannot be guaranteed no babies for another 2 years, life is as good as it can possibly be. i am insanely happy, the boy is too, i have this mammoth gaming beast sitting on my lap right now, and i am being taken to the melting pot for my birthday. what a happy life. |