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 �what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux "i desire to live in peace and to continue the life i have begun under the motto, to live well you must live unseen." - rene descartes note random entry image credit design by : ilazarn ikmal powered by : diaryland |
one of those days.
2011-07-26 @ 3:09 p.m.
i didn't want to post, but i will. it's a depression, hate myself sort of day. i've been let down a lot lately. my stress level is high. and then boy, who i love like crazy, despite this one particular flaw. he's ridiculously mean when anyone tries to wake him up. i don't think he knows what he's saying. i say "i don't think" because even though he says he has no memory of anything, you can never know for sure. he passed out early last night and i ended up having to stay up waiting for his laundry so it could go into the dryer, then when i tried to tell him something once we finally got in bed, he was so mean to me. so mean that i cried myself to sleep, and woke up this morning and cried some more. he only said one sentence to me and was snoring literally 5 seconds after he said it, so i'm sure he was sleeptalking again, but it hurt my feelings and given my current state, it put me in a terrible mood for all of today. he keeps talking about how he's going to go under hypnosis to quit smoking, and i'm going to tell him that he needs to also have them suggest that he not be such a fucking douchebag in his sleep. there are other things. but i usually don't let them bother me because they are outside of our safe world at home. now i feel like everything is wrong everywhere. but i always have these days. |