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�what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux

"i desire to live in peace and to continue the life i have begun under the motto, to live well you must live unseen." - rene descartes

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now for the strawberry cake in the refrigerator ...
2015-05-15 @ 7:36 p.m.


i've been sick ALL week, for the first time in a long time, things have been absolutely shitty with boy and everything, and in general i am in a real state over here.

so i dropped little A off at mom's girlfriend's house (whatever), and boy has to do another overnight, and i knew i'd be here all alone tonight so on my way back i decided to take a little drive by myself through this beautiful, secluded rural area.

it was perfect outside. i was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt with my sleeves rolled up and the breeze was so cool and refreshing. zero humidity. the sun was illuminating these little alcoves in the trees where there were some ancient houses hidden and it looked like magic. genuinely like the shire.

i felt great, and was really happy that i decided to go ahead and do that. i haven't been exploring in a really long time because in the winter it's meh, and then boy has been working nonstop since november. a couple weeks ago when he had an entire weekend off, we were like omg! it was really an event.

so i felt so incredible and invigorated even though my lungs are full of chunks. and i thought about what would be a great dinner considering my current inability to taste, and debated on it for a while before deciding to get sushi. it was what i wanted originally but i was like no, it'll be a waste because my taste is so off. but i went to our usual place (i've been ordering from this place since before i even lived in this house) and got some rolls and some salads, buying enough to get free chicken teriyaki which i will eat for lunch tomorrow with the leftover salads. and let me tell you, i did the right thing.

i mean, not only will i feel 100% better after eating this than i would had i gotten taco bell(!!), but this place never disappoints. they made one roll with tempura shrimp instead of regular shrimp, but the coating was so crisp and heavenly that i was happy for the mistake. everything is so fresh and vibrant and perfectly seasoned. they make their spicy tuna with dry chili instead of that gross spicy mayo that so many places do. it's fucking delicious. peppery and hints of citrus.

this meal really lifted my spirits.

like hey, thanks self. you really hooked us up tonight.