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 �what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux "i desire to live in peace and to continue the life i have begun under the motto, to live well you must live unseen." - rene descartes note random entry image credit design by : ilazarn ikmal powered by : diaryland |
another ruined day.
2010-07-16 @ 12:21 a.m.
today started off so well. he woke up and went to the dentist. he is 25% of the way to a new smile, after all of these years. finally he can feel confident and good again when he opens his mouth, and he can chew crunchy things and not worry about hurting himself more. so he went to get an impression taken of his mouth, and paid part of the overall bill, and told me all about his next few visits coming up. he said the dentist and his hygienist asked where i was, because they liked me. i thought that was cute. so he was all excited, then told me that she called and asked if he could go watch their son while she went on a job interview. he said of course, because a) he always wants to see his son and b) she might FINALLY be getting a job! which means no more $365/wk spousal support payments for her (no, that does not include child support. do the math on how much this fucking cunt makes per month just for having had sex at some point, been married for a couple years, and breathing). he went halfway up there and met her and waited in the parking lot with his son in the car while she interviewed. (she lives with her retired parents. why couldn't she leave him there for an hour?) he's watching the door, and like 20 minutes later she runs out, gets in her car, and peels out. he's like wtf? so he calls her and says, "okay, i know you're having a [bipolar] episode, so i'll be here when you're feeling better." she refuses to answer his calls, and like an hour passes so in the meantime he goes and does some errands with his kid, who is becoming increasingly concerned about where his mother randomly went. she calls bf to say she can't take it anymore (it = being a mom, even though she's the one who WANTED to have this kid, who REFUSED to have an abortion, and who REFUSES to let bf have custody) and she's going to kill herself. he calls me and says, "should i call the police? i'm in town near the court right now. i could go talk to the caseworker and tell them what's going on." and i told him to do what he thinks is right, so he called her one more time and said, "listen, i'm going to the court right now to tell them you abandoned your child and i'm taking him, and to report your suicide threats," and whaddya know!? psycho comes screeching back into the parking lot, rips kid out of the car, and peels away, calling him every 5 minutes (while driving of course) to tell him he's a horrible person, a horrible father, and all of her psycho bitch crazy moods are his fault because he refused to put her crazy ass on his health insurance after they got separated, so she can't get any bipolar medication. he came home to me weak, exhausted, defeated, and our day together was ruined. he was in a shit mood. we were going to go to the beach, play some mini-golf, and walk the boardwalk, then he was going to come home and fix his car. we ended up going to wendy's where he kissed me and told me he is so afraid i hate him because of all of this. and i told him he'd know if i hated him, and finally he laughed and said i'm the only one he feels happy with, ever. i wish there was less for him to worry about, to be upset about, to stress about. we haven't had sex in 2 weeks because he's so depressed. he said he feels emasculated by life. all he can think of is sleeping, and that he never sleeps enough. i'll be so happy when all of this is over, and it's just the two of us. |