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�what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux

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standards.

2011-10-04 @ 12:58 p.m.

boy: i know this is really awkward, but can you look at my ass? i have this sore spot and i can't tell if it's a pimple or something. it's not gross.
me: sure. (i looked, and it was just an ingrown hair or something that had gotten super swollen because i can TELL he was messing with it.) yeah, it's no big deal, you just need to do some sea salt soaks and put some of the green stuff (cure-all hippie ointment i love) on it.
boy: um ... okay. err, do you think you could help me out? with you know ... doing it? i know it's really awkward but there's no one else i can ask.
me: honey, of course. it's just swollen skin. it's not like it's actually IN your ass. it's no big deal. and besides, what am i good for if i wouldn't help you out?
boy: wow. (silent, then) what you just said made me realize that we're on two completely different levels sometimes.
me: what do you mean?
boy: well here i am sitting here thinking, what else could this girl possibly do for me?
me: hahaha, and i'm sitting here thinking, why wouldn't i help you out with something so simple? it's not like you asked me to do anything difficult. it's just your ass. i've seen it a million times.
boy: i think the conclusion is that we both need to raise our standards.
me, laughing: why's that?
boy: well, you surpassed mine so much that i figured you might like a challenge. and yours are just way too low. why else would someone like you be with me?

also, our anniversary is soon. he didn't remember to budget in our dinner on his money calendar, so as i was filling it out, i said, "and let's not forget about this day."

he looked over and said, "what's on that day?" just to piss me off, then said, "i could never forget that day. but seriously, just 2 years? it feels like 10."

and yeah, it really does. i always wondered how people stand marriage, just being with the same person forever. but now i totally understand.