| profile entries archives refresh |
 �what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux "i desire to live in peace and to continue the life i have begun under the motto, to live well you must live unseen." - rene descartes note random entry image credit design by : ilazarn ikmal powered by : diaryland |
love in the summer.
2013-06-28 @ 10:58 a.m.
there was initially a little tiff about the fact that we were likely going to miss hell's kitchen, but it was resolved quickly in the name of adventure, so we took the very long scenic route down to cape may, and just smoked and relaxed. on the way, we stopped at this random little antique store in the middle of nowhere (seaville, i believe?) and found the perfect birthday/late father's day present for my dad (we won't see him for another month or so to give it to him). when the lady who also owned the shop was ringing us up, she said that a man had come in twice looking for this weird little object but had been unable to find it in the store (we'd spotted it in a window). i felt kind of bad and almost wanted to leave it, but it was really the perfect thing for my dad and as the lady said, "finders keepers." cape may was beautiful and not crowded at all, and we walked to grab this rainbow popcorn we all love, afterwards deciding that we wanted to just completely gorge ourselves on boardwalk food, so we left for wildwood. we parked at one end, and walked almost the whole 2 miles to the other end searching for this ice cream place i've always loved, but had unfortunately closed (VERY unfortunately; it was boy's entire motive for the trip). the whole way the wind was really picking up (behind me i heard the comment, "whoa, marilyn monroe!" as my skirt blew up and away), and when we got down to the location, which now houses a nondescript pizza place, the sunny sky opened up and began pouring rain on us. we jumped on the tram car and took it halfway back to the car, jumping off in hopes of finding a rain slicker or umbrella but to no avail. boy bought me an overpriced plain black sweatshirt because my dress was completely soaked through and i was freezing, but of course about 5 minutes after it was purchased the rain went away and left us with a rainbow! under the cover of cotton candy, we ordered some snacks from this place that had nothing but ice cream and deep fried treats. i had my first fried twinkie, which - while being eaten in the car - caused me to immediately regret not buying another. but there's always next time. we took the scenic route home, too, into the beautiful sunset, and grabbed some quick chicken for a late dinner. while he was in the garage chatting with a new sexual prospect, i was exhausted from the day and the heavy late dinner and fell asleep in the basement. after about an hour and a half he came back inside, and i said i couldn't even sit down there anymore, i had to go to bed. i told him i was too tired to even take a shower. he wasn't tired at all and didn't follow, but that's okay. sometime in the night, i wake up to hear a whisper in my ear, "i'm sorry, but you just looked so sexy laying there," and then there's a hand between my legs, then a tongue, then everything else. i can barely keep my eyes open and i'm wondering if i'm really even awake, but his skin is so hot against me, his hands two fiery mitts on my arms and legs, and it feels so good. then, i'm asleep again, then i wake up to go to the bathroom and wonder, why is the moon so bright? but it's the sun rising, so i turn off the tv and fall asleep again. today? i woke up early and started doing laundry. my hair is a mess from the rain so i washed it and threw in a deep conditioner, and we're sitting together in the basement looking through netflix, talking about having breakfast for dinner. us forgetting everything, just living in the moment, in our own little world, has been the deep breath that i've needed. the me from a week or so ago, writing about how ... incomplete(?) i was feeling has not gone away, she is merely sated for a while with food and luxury and attention. i know in the back of my mind that boy will get called back to work soon, it's only a matter of time. and then i know everything will go back to the way it was. i think this is the tragedy of life sometimes. when you're a teenager you spend so much time wishing you were a grownup. and when you're a grownup you desperately clutch at those moments that you can again feel like you did back then. we're not that old. we're only 30. but as we were driving down to the beach yesterday, he said, "it's not like we're going to run out of things to do." and i said, "we won't, because we can't even do all of the things we already want to do. each day that passes only gives us more and more ideas." and i thought about that a lot, because next week we are going to nyc just for fun, and also to pa to take a train through the lehigh valley. it's too extravagant, i thought at first. but all the bills are paid, and there's a little extra in the bank, and if we don't do it now, when will we? so, here we go. you're only young once. |