| profile entries archives refresh |
 �what is Man? a miserable little pile of secrets.� - andr� malraux "i desire to live in peace and to continue the life i have begun under the motto, to live well you must live unseen." - rene descartes note random entry image credit design by : ilazarn ikmal powered by : diaryland |
fresh start.
2019-03-11 @ 11:20 p.m.
i had a really super relaxing weekend and am just gently cruising into the new week. everyone was complaining about losing the hour over the weekend but i kind of feel even better? the sun was out longer and even though i woke up at a really weird time this morning super thirsty, i managed to easily fall back asleep and wake up perfectly on time. like i just felt so fucking good today. and boss had a million errands for me to run, and we actually had quite a few sales so i was super busy all day and left pretty late tonight. the universe balances itself out. i took care of myself this weekend - i've been doing so in general - and the hours i lost taking off those few saturdays will be gained back this week when i come in earlier and have more energy to stay later. i think boss is feeling it too. he hates doing anything and going anywhere and spending money on anything but he took my recommendation and took DR and his whole part of the family out to this pizza place ~15 minutes from work. upon hearing about the location, he complained that it was too far away, and then too far back to his house, but DR was excited to try it so he gave in and went on saturday. he excitedly texted me from the street that he was going in!! it was so cute. i'm glad he's just being more adventurous and giving in to the experience. our lives have been so wildly different. he's like 13? years older than me but has lived such an unbelievably sheltered life. it's weird and interesting to talk to him. we're always learning something from the other. yo i'm just out here to say today that i love my cat, just wanted to mention that again. i'm always looking at inst and seeing cat memes and they're always like "yeah cats are assholes" but my cat kind of really isn't! he does some really really bad shit sometimes but generally he's the chillest, most agreeable, pleasant little guy. like i was just snuggling him in the kitchen as i was looking around to see what i needed to clean up and put away. he was almost totally limp in my arms, just purring and getting his face and chin scratched. then i put him down next to me here on the couch and he was like cool, imma take a nap then and purred like a maniac until he fell asleep sitting up. to me, he has turned into pretty much the ideal fur buddy. he has such an easygoing personality, like me. little anxious at first but all in all very nice. love him! don't love his fish breath. anyway it's only really 11:25pm but my BRAIN thinks it's 12:25 so i'm going to take a shower and get in bed. it's okay if i waste my time laying in there reading, but i hate hate HATE it when i wait until it's too late, and i'm taking a shower deliriously tired. i actually really enjoy showering so when i fuck my future self out of the experience i always regret it. i had so many things i wanted to say about what i was thinking about while i drove around this weekend. i drove by some familiar places, had some seriously painful memories. but now i can just feel them and let them go. sometimes there are some that come repeatedly but i just catch and release, like that moth that keeps getting in all summer. you keep putting it out, but every time you open the door it manages to sneak in again. that's okay. its lifespan is short, and it will die. and i will still live here. ok. snacks, shower, sleep. goodnight. |